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Michigan Family Law Blog

Seven Tips for Helping Parents Through a Custody Battle

Posted by Cameron Goulding | May 25, 2019 | 0 Comments

Custody battles are some of the most heated battles in family court. Parents who cannot agree to a custody and visitation schedule can put each other and their children through a traumatic, lengthy court battle. A Michigan child custody lawyer can help relieve some of your frustration and concerns. If fighting for custody is your only option, the following seven tips can help you as you go through the custody battle with your children. Remember, children are going through this battle too.

7 Tips to Help You and Your Child Through a Divorce Proceeding

  1. Consult with an experienced North Oakland Michigan family law attorney before you go to battle.

    Before you decide that doing battle with your child's other parent is the only way to settle a custody matter, talk to a North Oakland Michigan family law attorney about your case. Your lawyer may have strategies for winning your case without the necessity of instigating another World War III.

  2. Make every effort to settle your issues without contested litigation.

    You can battle your ex-partner for custody issues without allowing a judge to settle those issues. You and your child's other parent know what is best for yourselves and your children. Therefore, attempt to settle your differences through mediation.

    A mediator can identify issues that need to be addressed and guild constructive and productive discussions between the parties that can lead to a settlement that is in the best interests of all parties. Settling without litigation can also be less costly and time-consuming.


  3. Place your kids at the top of the decision pyramid.

    If you are going to battle for full custody of your children, every decision you make moving forward should have the children as your top concern. A judge is going to consider numerous factors to determine what is in the best interest of the child. If your child is happy, safe, well-adjusted, in good health, making good grades, integrated into the community and school, and loves being with you because you spend quality time with your child, your ex-partner may have more trouble attacking any of the factors a judge uses to determine a child's best interest.

    Your North Oakland, Michigan family law attorney can review the factors a judge uses to determine the best interest so that you can focus on these and other goals for your child.

  4. Never move anyone new in with you during a custody battle.

    It does not matter if you and your ex-spouse has agreed to move on with your life and date. You may even have an agreement allowing for roommates or significant others. Do not move a new lover into your home with your children, especially while you are still married.  You cannot predict a judge's personal opinion about what is in the best interest of a judge.

    The judge could believe that your actions show a lack of moral judgment. Even if the judge does not consider the move in terms of morality, the judge may wonder why you would move someone in during a time when your children need your full focus as you build a new life.

  5. Remain involved in your child's life.

    You are probably very busy now that you are doing everything by yourself. It can be easy to skip a few practices, games, or performances. You might hire a tutor to deal with homework and skip the science fair. A parent should be attending all school functions, meetings, and extracurricular activities if reasonably possible. Judges look favorable upon parents who are active participants in the child's life.

  6. Keep the drama behind closed doors that are soundproof.

    In other words, never say anything hateful or derogatory about your ex-partner where your children can hear. Do not negatively talk about your ex-partner to your children or when they can hear what you are saying. If you disagree with your ex, discuss the matter when the children are not present.

    A child's health, grades, and emotional well-being can greatly suffer when they see or hear their parents fight. You and your ex-partner could be the worst of enemies, and you may be involved in the worst custody case that has been tried in the state, but your kids should now be aware of any of it.

  7.  Do not push your child away from the other parent.

    Some parents find it easy to pull their child or push their child away from the other parent. Unless there is a reason such as abuse or neglect, studies have shown the children benefit from close relationships with both parents. It may be difficult for you to watch your child go away with your ex-spouse, but you need to keep your child's best interest as the top property, not your feelings.

Contact a Michigan Child Custody Lawyer

Our Michigan family law attorney hopes that the above information helped you as you try to navigate the divorce process. However, you do not need to do this alone. Schedule a consult with our Michigan family law attorney to help you in all matters related to your divorce, custody, and support. You need to have a strong advocate to protect your rights.

About the Author

Cameron Goulding

A native of Oakland County, Michigan, family lawyer Cameron C. Goulding has been providing counseling and legal services of the highest caliber to individuals and families in Southeastern Michigan for over 24 years. Mr. Goulding grew up in Oakland County, Michigan and graduated from Birmingham G...


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